In addition, the scenery was awe inspiring. On morning walks, I grew to appreciate and respect the varieties of wildlife. The guests were greeted by fellow walkers in the mornings and of course, Cocoa the recovery dog was recognized and greeted by a large number of neighbors as he accompanied us on our walks.

A Home Away is a place of love, healing and discovery. It is the beginning of a better way of life for many of us and our families.

Sincerely,
G.F., Manitoba

You deserve private, luxury rehab in British Columbia, Canada

Addicts have suffered far too long and A Home Away allows them to relax, rejuvenate, and learn how to live a healthy sober/clean life.  I can only begin to tell you the amount of work that is put into this amazing addiction retreat centre.  I only hope this letter will make you see that its more than just a treatment centre, but truly a place away from home.  Once I finished my 91 day stay, I moved to Kelowna and have since visited this Home because I know I am always welcome for meals and sharing anything that’s going on with me.

Jane and John Derry are a marvelous pair who truly just want to help individuals like myself who may not have a home or have a healthy one to go back to.  I appreciate you taking the time to read this letter.

Sincerely,

BD, Kelowna

Wow, my experience there was beyond anything to what I ever imagined! All of you were able to restore some order in my life, and make me feel happy with my own god given body. The mind; I have learned is a dangerous place to walk alone…and I learned that there. I learned how to have fun, without drinking, and to be honest shocking,  I didnt know I could snowboard…I knew i could snowboard drunk, but that probably looked even worse. haha. I learned to be ok with me, and most importantly my feelings…thank you….they were stressed to the max when i walked in the door of my house, I almost lost it….but I was able to hold a conversation, and yes there was an “I feel….. when you”….and wow it worked. Thank you also for reviving a passion/dream…that has been dead for so long….

There is no way a July semester is possible. October is the next, but if I can work enough, April I can make into for sure, and I sat down with my parents, and it went really well, they are both so happy I have found something  I’m willing to take a risk on other then the sure thing that I dont like, I was shocked, but I feel they find it comforting I have support there. I owe that to everyone who was at AHA with me, and discussed ideas with got feedback. or helped me write my essay! None the less, I will be coming to film school….to be the director, producer and writer I know is in me…and so be IT! I still also say my I AM statement daily, its engraved in me.

Everyone at a home away, are amazing! fun, caring, down to earth and very knowledgeable.  I love each and every one of them!

Thanks to you all, from the bottom of my…. used to be so black heart!!
It’s now red and pink again!
You all mean the world to me!

Matt

And I will see you all soon! Pretty sure at the BBQ,July 17th!  hint hint. haha.

One of the many activities Matt enjoyed at A Home Away was Horseback Riding

Thank you so very much!

Love,

Matthew, Sylvan Lake, Alberta

John and Jane Derry’s passion and compassion for creating and operating A Home Away is seen each day in their facilitating people to overcome their addictions.

I see their program as having two major components. First are the daily sessions where each person is challenged to take an honest look at themselves. This can be a difficult but rewarding process that is needed to initiate change.

But the individual isn’t left without support. This is where the second component of the program comes in. People are offered healthy options to replace old self defeating behaviours. This holistic approach helps the person to grow in mind, body and spirit.

This includes:

-Spiritual growth where Jane Derry has discussions encouraging the individual’s spiritual path, realizing this is a global community and there may be people with different faiths.

-Recreational outings where people are encourage to explore healthy activities.

-Yoga sessions, where people learn there are ways to take responsibility for our own health and experience the benefits.

-There are also the music sessions that I am pleased to lead. This is an inclusive group activity where, through improvised group drumming, people learn healthy community values and self empowerment.

-Even their delicious meals educate the guest to the importance of a well balanced diet.

I want to thank John and Jane for letting me be a part of this beautiful place of healing. I see how it helps the guests of A Home Away, and I also reap the rewards of this satisfying work. Their motto could be ‘We don’t help people…We help people help themselves!’

I would recommend A Home Away Retreat to anyone struggling with addictions and  wants to change.

Jim Copeman

Drum Circle Facilitator, and
World Fusion Percussionist
www.feeltherhythm.ca
www.myspace.com/smallchangeok

A Home Away Retreat is pleased to have Jim serve as Drumming and Music Facilitator on each Tuesday morning as an important part of the holistic approach of the addiction recovery retreat.

Thank you Jim for sharing your experience with A Home Away!

John Derry

Just wanted to say thank you soooo much for everything you have taught me!!

You have played such a huge part in my sobriety and life that words can not explain how grateful I am. I didn’t get a chance to write in the guest book so I just really wanted to let you guys know that I owe my life to you!!

What you guys do there is make miracles happen and you saved me from myself!!

Your support and love will not be forgotten and you and John have such a huge part in my heart that will never leave!! I thank you from the bottom of my heart and I do love both of you you’re amazing people!!

I little about where I am!! I am here in Kelowna with another alumni,  hit 2 meetings already, one yesterday and one today and having heard alot of inspiring things!!

I will definitely keep in touch with you guys and be seeing you guys tonight at the meeting if you do come!!!

Thanks again,

K.L.,  Alberta

It’s a spare!

In recovery we learn what true partnership means, and these three marriages have the very best chance of a lifetime of growth and acceptance and joy, one day at a time.

If you are an alumni with a wedding story, we’d love to hear about it!

Rev. Ross Leckie, Grace United Church, Brampton, Ontario

Sermon on April 4, 2010

It was early in the morning last week when I had breakfast with the creator of  “A Home Away,” a drug and alcohol treatment centre in Kelowna, British Columbia.  John was in town to spend time with his daughter last weekend.  We got talking about the encounters we have with people.  He told me about Debbie, who came seeking help with her addiction to alcohol and tobacco use.  It was Wednesday and the guests were talking about what they would do on their recreation day, Friday.  A recreation day may be obvious to you-an opportunity to just get away from the usual and have fun.  But there is more to it than that.  A recreation day is an opportunity for a person to get active, exercise and maybe even stretch their past experiences, perhaps even take a measured risk.

The general consensus around the table that morning was, “let’s go skiing.”  Debbie said, “I’d enjoy going along but I can’t ski.  I’ve got a sore back.  But, I’ll watch the rest of you.”  “Well, why can’t you ski,” said John.  “You can at least try.  We can get you the equipment and there are lessons available and a practice hill.”  “You’ll be surprised how well you can do.”  Debbie fell silent.  She said nothing more as the breakfast conversation continued, the meal was finished and the guests cleared the table.  Debbie rushed away to her room.

After breakfast and a short break the group participates in a joint counseling session each morning. John began by asking Debbie why she had not participated in the conversation around the table that morning and rushed off so abruptly after breakfast.  “You don’t understand,” she pleaded, “I really cannot ski.”  “Why can’t you just give it a try,” said John.  “I have scoliosis., I have to be careful with my back!”  “Who has told you that you can’t do these things,” John persisted.  “Well, my mother for one, but there have been others who said this too!”  I was told I couldn’t be a teacher because I’d be on my feet all day and my back was not strong enough for that.  So I took a secretarial job but I don’t like it.

Another person in the group said, “I’ve never skied before either.  But I’ve never been this close to a mountain.  I’ll go with you to a lesson.  We’ll give it a try together.”  Debbie was still resisting the whole idea.

“Debbie, you are going to go along with the group and give this a try, I think you will be able to do this and have a lot of fun too,” John continued the challenge.  At this point Debbie broke down weeping and sobbing at length.  “What is really the matter,” asked John.  “You are the first person who has ever said I could do something.”  “For all my life people have said what I could not do.”

Debbie joined the group in their excursion.  She took a lesson.  She mastered the practice hill in the next two hours and she was on the slopes acquiring at least a moderate skill by the middle of the afternoon.  The day was a rebirth for Debbie and a joy for the rest of her home group to experience with her!

Just days ago she celebrated one year sober.  The meeting room was ‘bursting’ with people loving and supporting her!  Her mother, whom she had been previously estranged from was there, with her sister, both from out of town.  Debbie’s mom now offers loving support and encouragement.  Debbie will soon complete her first year of college studying in a field she is really excited about.  She has experienced resurrection!

I think that first day for Mary Magdalene unfolded something like Debbie’s experience.  It began in panic and through her tears she began to confront her fears, to face them, and to be released beyond them to resurrection life.  Tradition tells us a little bit about Mary.  She may have been the same woman to have had demons exorcised from her by Jesus.  Mary is thought to have been a prostitute at an earlier time in her life.  We can only imagine the burdens that she was carrying which led her to that desperate situation.  It is also thought that she had been the one to break the jar of expensive perfume, to anoint Jesus’ feet and to dry them with her hair.

What drew Mary to learn more about this teacher, Jesus?  Well, Jesus had a reputation in accepting a wide variety of people, even including women among his followers.    Mary was one to take on responsibility and Jesus came to rely on her as one of the people who could get things done.

Mary came to love Jesus because he was the one to offer forgiveness, acceptance, hope, and new life to her.  He offered a healing that was beyond physical healing, a healing of one’s very soul.

The last few days had been horrific.  The spirit of the festival turned so quickly from celebration to tragedy.  In the blink of an eye it seemed, he was arrested, and then, when all the rest had forsaken him, the group of women found themselves standing at the foot of the cross—his cross—watching his life ebb away from him.

It was that scene that was still playing in her mind when she went to the tomb three days later to grieve for him once more.   Then she arrived to find the tomb empty.  It was all unfair.  Had someone stooped so low as to have actually taken his body- why? to desecrate it?  Her grief was overwhelming.  She began weeping and sobbing.  “Why are you weeping?”

What an insensitive question!  Didn’t they understand anything?  Her very heart was broken!  And who were these odd figures?  “Why are you weeping?  Who are you looking for?”  The questions kept coming.  From angels and this gardener.  Surely he must have been around.  Surely he knew what was going on.  Had the whole world gone mad?

Then, suddenly out of the fog and confusion, “Mary,” her name said by a familiar voice-not the gardener after all.   Soon the fear and confusion evaporated.  No one else said her name with such warmth and compassion—“Rabbuni”  “Master” it’s you!

Mary of Magdala was no longer the same.  She went and told the disciples, out of my weeping came joy.  “I have seen the Lord!”  He is with us.  He lives on!  I’ve been resurrected!

Writer Parker Palmer states this about the cross, “God’s heart was broken for the sake of humankind, broken open into a love that Christ’s followers are called to emulate.”  God’s heart was broken on the cross.  And the paradox is that God’s way of wholeness was made known through brokenness.  Our moderator, Mardi Tindal says, “in this season of Easter, we are able to celebrate and live God’s way of love and wholeness—but only to the extent that we face into brokenness, rather than turning away from it.”

We in the United Church of Canada find ourselves being broken into love.  We are broken in to love as we explore the work of truth-telling and restorative justice pursued through hearing from victims as they describe their Residential Schools experience.

Lent has been a season of apologies.  Golf great Tiger Woods went on television to apologize for letting his fans and his family down by a series of extra-marital affairs.  Halifax mayor, Peter Kelly apologized for the prejudice that banished black people to impoverished communities outside the city limits-like Africville—and then, when the land suddenly became valuable, forcibly evicted them.  Toyota president, Akio Toyoda repeatedly apologized to the U.S. Congress and millions of worried car-owners for defects in cars produced by his company, which once enjoyed an unrivaled reputation for quality.

Not one but two federal cabinet ministers have apologized for temper tantrums in airports.  Now, the Pope himself, Benedict XVI, apologized to the victims of childhood abuse by Irish Roman Catholic priests and leaders.  And the RCMP has apologized to the mother of Robert Czchancey about his death in the taser incident in Vancouver some months ago.

In all of these apologies that I have mentioned, hearts have been broken, trust has been severed, forgiveness has been asked for.  In 1986 the United Church of Canada made an apology to native persons.  “We have not valued you as gifted, equal people,” we said.  “We have not respected your traditions and your faith.”  The native people gathered to receive the United Church apology.  They said, in effect, “Let’s wait and see.”  We’ll walk together hand in hand and see how it goes.

An apology does not automatically generate forgiveness.  An apology expresses regret, but not necessarily repentance.  To repent means to change. Without change, an apology by itself is merely a confession, an acknowledgment of wrongdoing.  Repentance calls for a change of heart, a breaking of the heart which can lead to a commitment to live differently from now on.

Through the tears of those who have been wronged, through our tears as we listen of to those who experienced injustice, through our tears of struggle and frustration as we work to change the ‘systems’ which we are a part; through these tears Easter love is brought forth.  The invitation for all of us is to be “broken into love.”  It is then that we are invited into God’s way of wholeness.  Through the breaking and the healing we come to experience resurrection-a coming to life again!

Acknowledging inspiration from:

John 20:1-18

Smith, Dennis, John, The Storyteller’s Companion to the Bible, p.178-9

Tindal, Mardi, 40th moderator of the United Church of Canada, “The paradox of Easter,” The Observer, April 2010, p.15

Taylor, Jim, “Soft Edges,” Rumours (a web ezine), March 28, 2010

Today is 90 days for me…..90 days of abstinence. I made it through Easter dinner!!!

The first holiday in at least 15 years where I didn’t find myself bent over the toilet. I am free of all other substances too. This is a miracle, the miracle of recovery.

Thank You Jane, John, and everyone else at A Home Away.

Love the forever grateful N.J.

To A Home Away,

Thank you for giving me a new life.  I am forever grateful.  The gifts I have received here have exceeded my wildest dreams.  Surrendering to the process was difficult but the most rewarding.  I’ve learned a lot about the person I am because of this program.  It’s been and honour and a privilege to have known and met every single one of you.  Thanks and best wishes.

Lots of love,

D.E. Montreal

“Fine is less than good and good is the enemy of the best”

“Better be effective than efficient”

“Make your mess your message”